Joe Goes Despacito…

For the “you can’t make this stuff up” file
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Hoping to validate his “cool” credentials and  to connect directly with the intimately few attendees  at a Hispanic Heritage Month Event in Kissimmee, FL … here’s the way that Hidin’ Joe Biden opened his speech:

MUST WATCH=> click to view – 39 seconds
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The song is the sexy-salsa hit “Despacito”.

Besides Biden’s awkwardness, here’s what makes Biden’s song choice such a head-scratcher…

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For openers, “despacito” translates to “slowly”.

Trump has been referring to Biden as Sleepy Joe since he stays bunkered down, works a minimal campaign schedule and and appears fatigued when he does his teleprompter reads.

Question: Did Biden just encourage Trump to call him  “Despacito”.

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Second, was Biden even aware of the song’s theme and lyrics?

I think not.

Biden has been accused of “acting inappropriately toward women and girls”. Source

Eight women have alleged that Biden either touched them inappropriately or violated their personal space in ways that made them uncomfortable.

One of those women, Tara Reade, alleges that Biden sexually assaulted her in 1993.

Since Biden has denied the charges and tries to position himself as Mr. Clean, “Despacito” seems like an odd choice of start-up music.

According to Billboard

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Some specifics:

You, you’re the magnet and I’m the metal
I am getting closer and making a plan
Simply thinking about it makes my heart race

I want to breathe in your neck slowly
Let me murmur things in your ear
Slowly
I want to undress you in kisses slowly
Firmly in the walls of your labyrinth
And of your body, I want to create a manuscript
Slowly

I want to see your hair dance
I want to be your rhythm
Want you to show my mouth
Your favorite places
Let me trespass your danger zones
Until I make you scream

Get the picture?

As Billboard advises:

Whatever the reason behind your singing along, you should probably know that, although catchy, the words to the most-streamed song of all time aren’t that innocent.

You can’t make this stuff up…

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P.S. Predictably, Biden’s odd intro has spawned numerous parodies … here’s my favorite so far.

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